Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
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