I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
