Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
