I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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