nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
