dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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