k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I believe in your delicious
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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