im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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