isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
