I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
