You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
