I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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