i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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