Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Its about making memories worth repressing
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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