I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize