I'm going to jail i love you
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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