You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
