I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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