that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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