I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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