apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
