I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
