dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
