It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
