Can Purell be used as lube?
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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