So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Randomize
