he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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