Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
