break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
