Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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