She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
