Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Randomize
