when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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