We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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