She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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