how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
