You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
