A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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