she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
