but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Randomize
