how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
