just survived the first fart of the relationship.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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