whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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