Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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