So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
