How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
