How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
