Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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