i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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