You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
